I am single by choice but I don’t know why I keep on getting, let’s say, “indecent proposals” from guys with girlfriends or in a relationship. I’m not trying to get attention to anyone because I really don’t care about other people and i don’t really talk to other people that I’m not close to or if I’m bound to have a conversation with them because it is necessary. 

But these guys, I never really talk to them in person. We only have a hi-hello relationship since forever? If we ever have a normal conversation it’s always on text messages (since i can’t say no to them because we have known each other a.k.a. schoolmates). I don’t know if they’re reading my text messages wrong because I don’t text flirty text messages since I’m not into flirting. I don’t even know how to flirt. My personality is sort of “jolog”, childish and immature. Also I’m quite insecure about everything. You might think I’m very serious because of my poker face but deep inside I’m judging everything and ranting and laughing in my mind. Also I’m mildly crazy.

I just don’t get it. Why are these guys… This makes me want to repel to human beings more and just stick to my pet dogs and own a lot of cats and be an old maid. Maybe because of what they see on television, I guess. Since having a mistress is so mainstream that guys also wants a third wheel in their relationship so it will get exciting and complicated. Well hello!! This is the real world people!

I can get those guys if I want to but it’s unethical and it’s not right. (also my social skills are very rusty) I keep on telling them that it’s cheating but they keep on saying it’s not, we just have keep it between us. =_= WELL THAT’S BULLSHIT. This makes me hate men more. This will make me more anti-social and have bigger trust issues in the near future. I just hate my life. Let me bury myself or let there be zombie apocalypse.

I WILL NEVER HAVE A HEALTHY LOVEY-DOVEY RELATIONSHIP~ 

T________________________________________T